If you’re not aware of the latest daily mail attack on ‘slummy mummies’ and haven’t seen the hashtag #solidaritea floating around social media this past week then where have you been?! If you haven’t than let me summarise for you (you probably don’t want to read the article as it will give you actual mum rage):
Some ‘journalist’ called Anna May Mangan decided to launch an attack on wonderful mum bloggers such as the lovely Sarah Turner, Clemmie Telford, Katie Kirby and Steph Douglas. Basically she said that you shouldn’t ever moan about your children on social media, you shouldn’t laugh and you most certainly should bottle everything inside in case you offend her. Fun is strictly not allowed when you are a mum, didn’t you get the memo?
I can’t even begin to imagine what kind of
person monster this Anna is. I don’t know anything about her, and hope I never will, but I can only assume she doesn’t have children or, if she does, that the Nanny raised them while she sat and judged everyone else on her computer. This is the kind of woman who clearly doesn’t have an ounce of human decency, respect or compassion in her body.
Being a mum is fucking hard. Just because I think that doesn’t mean that I don’t love my son. It also doesn’t mean that I am a bad mum, it is just a part of my life now. For every amazing thing he does/learns there is also something challenging which likes to pop up now and again. Milo goes through phases of eating, some weeks he loves food and some weeks he doesn’t and I refuse to feel guilty if the only thing he will eat some days is turkey dinosaurs or potato waffles. As long as he is eating something than who the hell cares?!
I find myself sometimes censoring the things I post on here or on Instagram incase I offend someone and I live in constant fear of some troll coming along and telling me what I am doing is wrong or calling me out for the smallest of things. I have been lucky so far as all my followers have been the kindest and most compassionate human beings who have got me through some hard times by sharing their experiences. It is important to share how you feel with people, being a mum,or a dad (I don’t want to leave the dads out, I’m just writing from my experience as a mum) is the most demanding, frustrating and often lonely job you will ever have. If Anna May Mangan had any idea of the demands of parenthood I don’t think she would have penned such a reckless article.
I am so thankful for the reception that it received though. Every mum and dad united to on social media to tell her where to shove her opinions. This quote I found perfectly sums up the whole situation for me:
‘You can tell who the strong women are. They are the ones you see building up one another instead of tearing each other down’
Anna is not a strong woman and I hope she is now deeply ashamed of the fact she tried to mum shame some of the most fantastic mothers. I could say a lot worse things about my feelings towards this woman but that would more than likely defeat the purpose of what I want to get across in this post.
Reading some of this article, and most of the responses to it I feel like I learned such a huge life lesson I took away something from it. Most mums out there and trying their best. I was walking through town with Milo in my arms while he threw the biggest hissy fit yesterday and some people gave me that ‘oh dear’ smile and others scowled at me. I vowed I would never judge anyone ever again and always help where I can. Where does judging get you? I know I feel worse than someone is judging me so why would I do that to them? I thought I knew exactly what kind of parent I was going to be when I was pregnant but life just doesn’t turn out the way you expect. A baby does not just fit into your life, your life completely changes and adapts to what this baby wants. I said I would never give Milo chocolate but here we are 14 months later using it as a blackmailing technique for a peaceful meal or shopping trip. Am I guilty about that? Am I fuck. If I can eat a meal without having someones little hands taking everything off the plate rubbling it on the carpet or his face and then putting it back on my plate then I will do anything to make that possible.
So I think? my point in all of this rambling was that you should be kind, be supportive and not read the absolute dribble in the daily mail. Instead you should read The Unmumsy Mums reply here: http://theunmumsymum.blogspot.co.uk/2017/05/dear-anna-response-to-that-daily-mail.html (it is ace!).
Love Alex x